Mary Anne Schwalbe and her son Will shared a longtime passion for books. She had been a dean at Harvard and Radcliffe and he was editor-in-chief of a major New York book publisher.
When Mary Anne was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 2007, the two decided to read books together in what he later dubbed “The End of Your Life Book Club.”
Will Schwalbe describes his growing admiration for his mom in this captivating story that excels as a celebration of literature, a heartfelt tribute to an amazing woman, a reflection on living and dying, and a touching account of an enviable mother-son bond.
Together they devoured fiction, biography and poetry by writers such as Ian McEwan, David Halberstam, Wallace Stegner, J.R.R. Tolkien, Marilynne Robinson, William Trevor, Mary Oliver, Joan Didion, and Stieg Larsson – a process that led to lively discussions about the enduring value of books and reading.
Readers likely will encounter authors and titles that will inspire them to read some of the books that moved Will and Mary Anne. Her favorite book of all time, surprisingly, was Gone With the Wind.
Will fondly remembers his mom’s practice of reading him stories at bedtime, as well as the times when his parents would spend hours in the living room, each with a stack of books to savor.
“Mom was always a little amazed,” Will writes, “at parents who thought their kids should be reading more but who never read themselves.”
Doctors told Mary Anne that her pancreatic cancer was treatable but not curable, and gave her three to six months to live. In her remaining time she was determined to keep up with her many humanitarian commitments. She had visited refugee centers around the world, helped settle refugees in the United State, and in her final months raised money to build libraries in Afghanistan.
As Mary Anne gradually declined, grateful refugees living in the United States traveled to visit her when they heard she was sick.
Will is that rare middle-aged man unafraid to acknowledge his deepest feelings. His eyes often filled with tears as he struggled to come to terms with his mom’s decline. He wanted to say “I love you,” but feared breaking down in front of his mom, so instead he said, “I’m proud of you.” But there is no mistaking the beautiful bond between them.
“I was learning,” he writes, “that when you’re with someone who is dying, you may need to celebrate the past, live the present, and mourn the future all at the same time.”
The book is never maudlin or overly sentimental. Even though the reader knows that the story will end with Mary Anne’s death, the lively narrative impels readers to keep turning the pages.
Mary Anne’s life was defined by books and compassion. Even in her final months when she found walking difficult, she was still giving up her seat on buses for older people, pregnant women and children.
Strangers often commented on her radiant smile. She once was sitting in the waiting room at a doctor’s office when another patient got up to compliment her smile. Mary Ann then sat next to the woman, held her hand and listened to her story.
She lived nearly two years after her diagnosis, never wavering from her belief that “books are the most powerful tool in the human arsenal.” One of her greatest fears was that in the months before she died she would be too sick, tired or unfocused to read.
The End of Your Life Book Club will leave readers in awe of this magnificent woman and with appreciation for a precious mother-son relationship.
The End of Your Life Book Club, by Will Schwalbe; Knopf, 336 pp., $25
Bill Williams is a freelance writer in West Hartford, Conn., and a former editorial writer for The Hartford Courant. He is a member of the National Book Critics Circle and can be reached at billwaw@comcast.net.